Reflections on Life and Books: My Personal Journey

In the quiet corners of my life, where the pages of books have whispered secrets and stories, I’ve found a solace that transcends the mundane. Books have always been more than mere companions; they’ve been my guides, my mentors, and my silent confidants. My journey with reading began in the austere halls of Sainik Awasiya Mahavidyalaya, where I was just a nine-year-old boy thrust into a world where phones and gadgets were forbidden. The library became my sanctuary, and the words within those pages became the windows to worlds I could only dream of.

Reading has always been a refuge, a place where I could escape the pressures of reality. Naval Ravikant’s wisdom taught me about the intricacies of life, wealth, and happiness. His insights resonated deeply, especially as I navigated the ups and downs of my own journey. The philosophy of seeking freedom, both financial and personal, echoed in my heart, reminding me of the importance of self-discovery and resilience. As Ravikant wisely said, “Desire is a contract you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.” This resonated with my own aspirations and the continuous pursuit of goals.

But amidst the pages of wisdom and adventure, my heart found its own story to tell — a story of love and loss, of dreams and despair. Subina, or Subu as I affectionately called her, was the first girl who touched my soul in a way that no book ever could. Our bond was woven with threads of innocence and curiosity, growing stronger with each passing day. I still remember the first day I met her, not a love at first sight, but a connection that grew with every conversation.

Love and Letters: The Story of Subu and Me

“To the person who was so close to me……**I have always been the person who believed whoever comes to my life comes with a reason. There were many people around, but I chose you. I chose you to share my secrets, I chose you to share my pain. Because I thought to make your stay forever, you need to know me better.” -Open Letter by Abhishek Kandel, 2020, Scribble Stories

These words, penned in 2020, were a testament to the depth of my feelings. Subu was my confidante, my muse, and my source of endless inspiration. Our bond was more than just friendship; it was a connection that transcended the ordinary. I prayed for her, thought of her every day, and wished for a future where we could be happy together. But as life would have it, our paths diverged, and the closeness we once shared became a distant memory.

“By this time, I’ve realized sometimes in life, we have to make a decision that hurts our hearts, but the decision is compulsory. Everything depends upon destiny. You and I were meant to cross our paths the same way, you and I were meant to create the memories the same way, but you and I forever were never meant to be.” -Open Letter by Abhishek Kandel, 2020, Scribble Stories

In 2023, I wrote another letter to Subu, trying to capture the essence of our evolving relationship and the bittersweet nature of our shared past.

“Subu, our paths have diverged, but the memories we created still linger in my heart. I often find myself wandering through those memories, cherishing the moments we shared. I hope you are doing well, and though we may be apart, a part of me will always wish the best for you.” -Letter written on October 12th, 2023, marking the commencement of five incredible years of our journey (maybe) together

Our story, much like the tales I read in my books, had its own twists and turns. The name “SuAbhi” became a symbol of our togetherness, a fusion of our identities that still resonates in my heart. Even as time carries us away from the inception of our story, the essence of “SuAbhi” remains a melody that transcends the passage of time.

The Wisdom of Words: Lessons from My Books

As I reflect on my journey, both in life and in love, I realize that the books I’ve read have always been a mirror to my soul. From the profound teachings of Naval Ravikant to the timeless wisdom of Khaled Hosseini’s “The Kite Runner,” each book has left an indelible mark on my heart. Hosseini’s tale of friendship, betrayal, and redemption mirrors my own experiences with Subu, reminding me of the fragile nature of human connections and the power of forgiveness. As Hosseini wrote, “For you, a thousand times over,” I find echoes of my own willingness to go to great lengths for those I care about.

Stephen Hawking’s “A Brief History of Time” has been another beacon in my life, inspiring me to look beyond the immediate and ponder the mysteries of the universe. Hawking’s quest for knowledge and his resilience in the face of adversity have been guiding lights, encouraging me to pursue my dreams, even when the path seems uncertain. His words, “However difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at,” have been a source of unwavering motivation.

During my time at Sainik Awasiya Mahavidyalaya, I also found a love for the strategic intricacies of chess. The game taught me patience, foresight, and the importance of every move, mirroring the life lessons I found within the pages of my favorite books. Chess, like reading, became a sanctuary, a place where I could lose myself and yet find profound truths about life.

Friendships and Growth: My Journey Beyond Books

The friendships I formed at Kathmandu Model Secondary School were another pivotal part of my story. As the Computer Club President, I organized events like TechnoFest and CodeJam, fostering a sense of community and shared passion. These friendships, though sometimes strained by the passage of time and the demands of life, have taught me the value of loyalty and the bittersweet nature of growing up.

Today, as I stand at the crossroads of my journey, I carry with me the lessons learned from books, the memories of a love that once was, and the hope for a future where I can continue to grow and evolve. My story is still being written, with each page bringing new challenges and new opportunities. And through it all, I find solace in the words that have shaped my life, knowing that no matter where my journey takes me, the love for reading will always be my guiding star.

My Bookshelf: A Testament to My Journey

My bookshelf is a testament to my journey: from Erica James’s tender tales of love and devotion to Neil deGrasse Tyson’s explorations of the cosmos in “Astrophysics for People in a Hurry.” Each book is a chapter of my life, a reflection of the experiences and emotions that have shaped who I am. Books like James Clear’s “Atomic Habits” and Cal Newport’s “Deep Work” have guided me in my professional endeavors, teaching me the value of focus and persistence.

The emotional depth of Colleen Hoover’s novels, such as “It Ends With Us” and “Ugly Love,” resonate with my own experiences of love and loss. The wisdom in Robert Greene’s “The Laws of Human Nature” and the financial insights from Robert Kiyosaki’s “Rich Dad Poor Dad” have provided me with valuable perspectives on life and success. Greene’s observation, “People around you, constantly under the pull of their emotions, change their ideas by the day or by the hour, depending on their mood,” has been particularly enlightening, helping me understand the complexities of human nature.

Reflecting on my journey, I realize that my life, much like the books I treasure, is a tapestry woven with threads of joy, sorrow, hope, and discovery. From the bustling halls of Sainik Awasiya Mahavidyalaya to the introspective moments spent with a book in hand, every experience has contributed to the person I am today. And as I continue to write the story of my life, I am grateful for the pages that have been filled and the ones yet to come.